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A girlfriend should be a potential mate for life. If you know the person youre with isnt someone you can see having a relationship with you need to break it off. Dont keep her around while you look for better. She is a person, not a car that you are going to keep using until you find a better one. Whether it is an annoying little habit that drives you crazy or something hard to overcome, like deep personal beliefs that you dont see eye to eye on, break up and move on. Keep in mind no one is perfect, including you, so dont become so critical that you are looking for any reason to break up.
When dating dont start anything you arent willing to maintain for the duration of the relationship. If you buy elaborate gifts and drive across town everyday during lunch just to see her make sure you are willing to do that long-term in some capacity. One problem couples have after marriage is that over time the well thought-out cards and flowers are replaced with the box of cheap chocolate and last minute card from a convenience store. Much like the business owner who hands out Christmas bonuses to his employees in the first couple years you better be willing to maintain that giving or you will have someone who is disappointed once it stops. It doesnt mean you start out being a cheapskate but before you spend a good chunk of your salary on a present you need to remember that youre setting the bar and anything in the future and anything that doesnt meet that maybe a letdown. Besides, if she wont like you because she didnt get an expensive present then she isnt a good person and you need to find another.
Fixer uppers are for houses not women. Dont think you can fix a flawed person. Love and emotions are strange and often make no sense. If you are dating awoman that doesnt have the courtesy to call you back, changes plans at the last second with little regard to you, or has some illegal bad habits, dont think you can win her over and change her. Move on and find the person that wont play games or have that destructive behavior. People at their core rarely change and almost never change when they arent held accountable. And anyone that puts up with her behavior is being an enabler. If youve struggled with alcohol or drugs your sobriety should be of upmost importance and you need to watch who you are around even if shes beautiful.
Never cheat on a woman and never allow cheating. This is a one-strike youre out situation. There are couples who claim their love grew stronger after cheating.and who knows maybe it did, but those are the rare exceptions to the rule. If it is even true. Loyalty is a must from you and her. Even flirting and private lunches with a male friend are not to be tolerated and should be stopped immediately. Once she knows what you expect from her she has the choice of changing or losing you. This is black and white.
Dont live together unless you are married. Living together to see how it will work out is BS. You dont need to move in with someone to know what theyre like. Playing house will do nothing but cheapen the relationship and create situations that will cause problems both financially and personally. Even if you live in an expensive area where having roommates is necessary you need to live with other men or find a place cheap enough that you can afford.
Dont get engaged until youve dated for a minimum of one year. When you do get engaged you should marry within one year. Engagements that are four and five years out are ridiculous and diminish the special meaning of the ceremony. If you are both in college and have years to go before you finish and want to marry after you both graduate then just keep dating and wait until graduation nears to announce the engagement. If you date for four years then get engaged people are excited for you and admire you. If you are engaged for four years when invitations finally go out for the wedding there is an about time attitude instead of happiness from friends and relatives. And if youve been living together for years while engaged most people could really care less about the wedding other than the parents. Making a wedding special isnt about lavish decorations or limos it is about two people taking vows in front of their families with God as their witness to love and care for each other.
When dating a woman that was previously married proceed with caution. Maybe she is a great person who just happened to be unlucky or chose the wrong guy the first time but dont automatically assume the latter. The older you get the more likely it will be that you are dating a woman who was previously married, and while that by no means makes her an automatic no, it does mean you should proceed with an extra amount of caution.
If you are dating a woman with children that had them out of wedlock you need to proceed with a truck-load of caution. A woman having children out of wedlock is a problem waiting to happen. Most women with children that are single are looking for someone to hitch their wagon to. They are often looking for someone to help ease their financial and parental situation; in other words a babysitter that provides money instead of costing money. If you chose to date a woman in this situation you need to not even talk about getting engaged for over a year no matter how good it is going. You need to not provide financial support while dating. Paying for dinner, babysitter and a movie is one thing but dont start paying her bills or helping with rent. You can help her in other ways like watching the kids so she can take care of errands or working on items for her around the house so she doesnt have to hire someone but dont hand money directly to her.
When it comes to her children if you cant visualize yourself adopting her children and taking care of them as your own for the rest of your life you need to end the relationship and move on. Whatever you do never blame her children. Never blame children on adult matters; that is too easy of an out and only a weak man would blame a child and lay that guilt on them.
A woman with children from a previous marriage is a package deal. You arent just dating her. Her kids are part of her and her ex-husband or boyfriend depending on the circumstances so you need to take that into consideration. If the children are grown it is a much smaller consideration but if theyre minors you have to ask yourself if you want to raise them and call them your own. If the answer is no then you shouldntdate the woman let alone marry her.
Unless you want an adult dependent dont date women that are helpless. A woman that has no goals, dreams, or interests is one that is going to be on the edge of dissatisfaction and not know why. A woman that cant function without you isadependent not a spouse. Be careful when dating the woman that cant function without help or is easily led in any direction. This is another reason to wait at least a year before considering marriage. The woman that needs you for her happiness and to make her life complete is a huge ego boost in the beginning because she makes you feel like a king because she needs you so bad but that happiness is like a fire that needs to be constantly fed. Later on in the relationship when she is looking to you for her happinessyou will feel smothered.
Modern society has mistakenly portrayed stay at home moms from previous generations as weak little servants to their familys. Truth was most women from generations past worked harder and were as mentally tough as any woman with a corner office and a pant-suit. Dont mistake the woman that says she wants to stay at home and raise a family as a weak woman.
Dating the corner office pant suit woman is another challenge altogether. The first problem with these women is that they may expect the man to be the at-home anchor half of the marriage so they can pursue their career interests putting themselves first and everyone else second. They can also tend to look down at the man who isnt keeping up with them career wise. There is nothing wrong with the career driven woman, it just depends on how you are with it. This is why self-evaluation is so important. If you can handle possibly putting your career on hold to focus on raising the kids because her career path is progressing quicker than yours than dating and marrying the career woman is fine. If your ego is going to be bruised and your worth as a man be challenged theres nothing wrong with that you just owe it to be honest with yourself and her before things get too far down the road.
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Winter can be tough on the dating and going out. Snuggling up to your partner and watching a movie is much more inviting than braving the cold. I would like to encourage you to be brave, put on your scarf, and take on the cold. I have some great winter date ideas. So, when the movies get old and you want to get some air, try these out.
Hot chocolate crawl – it’s like pub crawling, but more fun. Find the coffee shops and restaurants around you that serve great hot chocolate. Go on an adventure by visiting them all. Take pictures on the way and just have fun.
‘Netflix and chill’ – yes, it’s cliché, but make it interesting. Have a movie marathon of your romance favorites. Light candles, make a picnic, get some wine and cuddle up.
Cook together – if outside is too cold, stay in and cook together. Find recipes that you have always wanted to try. Cooking together is a great time for conversation.
Take a wine tour – wine, lots and lots of wine. Book a wine tour to learn a few things and enjoy a few sips of delicious wine. You will probably walk away with a bottle or two for that Netflix and chill evening.
Back to basics – go skiing or ice skating. Build a snowman together or have a snowball fight. Once you get started, you won’t even feel the cold. So, gear up and get out there.
Spa day – you will definitely not feel the cold here. Book a spa day for couples. You can be warm, relax and be spoiled from head to toe.
Get some exercise – join a dance class, yoga class or gym. Find an activity that can get you sweaty and hot to beat the cold. It’s so much more fun to do it together.
You can also try taking a dance class or winter cleaning. The best thing is to be creative and try new things. Don’t let the cold get to you. If you have tried all these and still need something to do, there is only one thing left. Stay in, close the curtains and get steamy.
Tired of going on dates that go nowhere? Are you looking for love but it’s hiding? If you think you have tried everything and still have no luck, it’s time to make a change. We have the ultimate dating tips to get you out of your dead-end streak.
Change your scene. If you go to bars or clubs to meet new people, maybe it’s time to change your scene. Try something different. Join a club. Take part in a fun event. You never know who you might meet.
Pick a dating site. There are many dating sites and apps out there. Do some research and find the one that works for you. There are many lists of these things with ratings. Many people have found their perfect match like this.
Get set-up. Let your friends set you up with their friends. This way you know they are safe and possibly really cool. They are after all friends with your friends. You might just find someone who is perfect for you.
First impressions. The impression you make on someone for the first approximately 10 minutes, is lasting. When you meet someone, bring out all the guns. Smile, make eye contact, be confident and interesting. Remember to also make sure whether you like the person on the other end.
Verbal patrol. The fastest way to spoil the first date is oversharing. If you get nervous, that’s ok, but try to keep the guard at the door. Babbling, talking about your ex, sharing unwanted information or admitting to stalking his/her Facebook page, is a bit much. It will be tough to recover.
Don’t force it. If you are not into the person on the other side, don’t date them. There is no point in going on this journey of you already know it’s going to end soon. Be honest with yourself and your date. Don’t be cruel, though.
Hopefully, these tips will renew your spirit for dating. Your person is out there. Until you find him or her, enjoy the ride and try to have some fun along the way.
Everyone is looking for those magic words or magic beans to make a relationship last. Truth is, many people don’t realize that a relationship takes commitment and work. It doesn’t just work and stay great forever. It doesn’t work that way. The good news is that there are a few things you can do from the beginning. If you implement these things when you start dating all the way through, your chances of lasting love will increase.
Create a safe space
All couples fight. Create a space where it is safe to share your feelings. Avoid name-calling and dragging up the past. Let your partner speak and listen. If you are too angry, step away and take a breath. Come back when you have calmed down.
This is something you need to learn and develop. It requires you to put all judgments aside and treat your partner with compassion. This will drastically improve interaction and communication
Be individual within the team
It often happens that people who are dating lose themselves. This happens because they lose their individuality in the relationship. Learn to be yourself and contribute as an individual while staying true to the team.
Facts vs. feelings
Ask yourself if things you fight about is fact and real or based on past experience and feelings. As humans, we often react to things based on past experience. Learn to differentiate between what is now and what is not.
Make time to be together
Time together is very important. No matter how busy life gets, you need to find the time. A relationship needs to be nurtured to thrive. Turn off your cell phones. Go for a walk and just talk.
These things make a relationship grow. It creates a positive environment. In the end, it is important to be kind to each other, communicate and be honest. If you do that, you are on the right track.
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